My Cup

I was, I am, a "people pleaser".  The difference between the people pleasing Janet then, and the people pleasing Janet now, is that it no longer defines me. 

It took a lot of reflection, prayer and resolve for me to understand that my self-worth is not based on how my offering was received. I am no longer a "people pleaser", my intent now is to please people. The rearrangement of these two words made a big difference. 

I am, and always have been, a nurturer. I give and do things for others because it brings me tremendous joy and satisfaction to do so. Unfortunately, there were times that I allowed the acceptance, or appreciation, of my gestures and actions to dictate how I felt as a person. It was unfair and wrong of me to place this silent obligation on the receiver. A gift is a gift and not something that should ever have strings attached to it, seen or unseen.

For most of my early adult life, I held out my cup and asked others to fill my cup. I know now, what I wished I learned earlier, is that the cup is mine to fill.