Tuesday, December 28, 2021

Piper

For all the challenges that this past year brought, for the Alden family 2021 will always be remembered as "Our Year with Piper". Piper was our neighbor and friend Sheila's 13-year-old Bichon Frise and we loved her like family. 

On Monday the 20th, Sheila took Piper to the emergency vet where they discovered a large tumor on her spleen. Sheila had to make that awful decision that no pet owner ever wants to make. She was saying "good-bye" to Piper too soon. 

Because I found it so helpful to me, I recommend to my pet-loving friends that they write down the little things that their pets do that make them so special. I do this for Missy, but I started it with our previous dog Ginger. I kept a little notebook and in it I would include, not only the day-to-day things she did, but all the silly, funny and unique little traits that made her so loved. 

We lost our Ginger (after 10 years) to an aggressive cancer on March 12th, 2012.  Now, all these years later I read the entries and I am amazed at how many things I had forgotten; how many things still make me cry and how much I still miss her.  

From that very first day in May when Piper came into our house, she became a part of our family. She adapted and blended in with us so seamlessly. She really was a sweet little girl, and she has left us with so many memories. I'd like to share some of my Piper memories with you*

𑁦 In the morning when it was time to go pick up Piper, I would say "It's time to go get our little friend" and Missy would come racing out of her room and we headed next door to get "our little friend". 

𑁦 Once at Sheila's house, I'd hitch Missy to the post at the bottom of the porch and go inside to get Piper. Most mornings, she was waiting and would greet me at the back door with her tail wagging. I'd gather her and her things up and we'd go outside. Piper would race out of the door and was always excited to see Missy, but Missy, Missy was all like "Meh". I know that she loved Piper, she just bolted out of the house to get here after all, but Missy always plays it cool with everything and was "Yea. Hello. Whatever. Big deal. I saw you yesterday. Can we just go for our walk please."

𑁦 With both Missy and Piper, aka "The Girls", in tow, I'd head out for a walk around the neighborhood. Piper always had to be up front, and once Piper started walking, she took her job very seriously. I take Missy out for a lot of walks alone because she can be quite difficult - Missy likes to meander and smell everything so I end up having to apologize to our walking buddies that we have to slow down, yet again, to wait for Missy. But Piper, she was all business!  When she was out in front leading us, she did it with such determination and focus and we had to keep moving just to keep up. Piper had the sweetest little ears and I loved to watch them bop bopping as she pranced along. Made me laugh every single time!

Sheila said that every time I walked by the house with Missy, Piper would jump up from wherever she was and go to the door and bark because she wanted to join us. I guess she didn't mind Missy's meandering! 

𑁦 Once we came to our house, Piper would lead us to the garage side door. But once she got there, she waited. Piper was very polite and cognizant of respecting Missy and her house. She only had to get mowed over by Missy once or twice to learn that, even if she got there before Missy, Missy always had to go in first. And Missy's rule applied to the door from the garage to the house too. "Different door, same rule Piper. I go in first". So, Piper patiently waited for Missy to go in first, then she came in. But she didn't just "come in" with a step. Nope, Piper bounced in. Every single time she entered our house, sweet girl bounced in.  Adorbs!  

𑁦 Once Piper was in our house, the first thing she did was go right to the water bowl and take a big drink. We have the same water supply as Sheila, but for some reason, she liked the "Alden" water. Both Missy and Piper got a little treat when we came back from our morning walk, but Missy knew she had to wait until after Piper had her drink, and joined us, before treats were dispensed. Missy is not a very patient dog, but she knew she had to wait for Piper, so she did. 

𑁦 Piper had a few favorite spots in our house. When I was in the kitchen or living room, she would lay on the floor by the plants - from there she could keep an eye on me. She also had a dog bed under the sideboard in the kitchen and if she wasn't by the plants she was under the sideboard. Sometimes, she lay on the floor, right next to the dog bed, although honestly, I couldn't figure that one out!

Piper's other bed was in my studio. On the days that I spent in the studio; Piper was in the dog bed near my feet. As long as she knew that she wasn't alone, she would soon fall into a deep sleep and snore. And snore she did! Bless her little heart, girlfriend could snore! 

𑁦 After a few weeks, Missy got over her obsession with needing to know where Piper was at all times, and we got ourselves settled into a nice routine - Missy would be in 'her' room and Piper was wherever I was. Sometimes, many hours would go by without any activity at all from either dog. When the weather was nice, we'd go out for another walk or go sit outside in the back. It wasn't long before we fell into a nice, easy and comfortable rhythm and our days passed by nicely.

𑁦 Sometimes there would be a little activity in the front of the house that would get Missy's attention. Missy would start barking and that would get Piper up, so off she went into the other room to check it out. Missy would look back over at Piper and relayed some signal that meant her bark was required as well. Piper could not see out of the window, but if Missy 'told' her to bark, she barked. 

𑁦 When the "Turfmaster" man came to the house, I would have to open the front door to let the girls out because they carried on so. He had dogs and he always gave Missy and Piper lots of loving. Once they learned who he was, they were not about to let him go without getting their ears scratched or their belly rubbed.  After that was done, the girls would come back into the house content, and he was able to do his job. 

𑁦 I can't share memories about Piper without talking about her farts! Look at this face! How is it possible that this sweet little girl would be able to produce room-clearing farts?!  And what made it so adorable was that she did it without waking up or even being aware that she was doing it! I was a little apprehensive about bringing up Piper's 'situation' with Sheila, but once I did, oh! how we laughed! She had quite a few stories to share too! 

𑁦 Piper LOVED Bill. When she came into the house and saw Bill, she would immediately go up to him to get her ears scratched. Most days she would not let me leave her sight, but if Bill was home, she would sit on the back porch with him for hours. She adored him. If she was at our house later, she would go into the bathroom with him and lay there as he shaved. She'd lay outside the shower and when he exited, he had to be careful as to not step on her. She only came out when he was done. Bless her heart, sweet Piper had a little crush on my husband.❤️

𑁦 Dinner times with the girls were always an adventure! The first time I attempted to feed Piper at our house, Missy tried to eat her food first. Missy has spent her whole life acting like she is starving to death. She is not possessive of her food, but she is absolutely and definitely food focused. There was no way that Piper would be able to get to her food dish and eat it before Missy approached and overtook her. Then, we tried to feed Missy first, but that didn't work out either because Missy would eat her food super-fast because, apparently she thought that if she finished all of her food, then she would get Piper's food too. We needed a new plan.

So, after much trial and error, we figured out how to feed the girls. We would prepare both bowls of food at the same time and then I would say "Let's go eat" and we would go outside. I would pick up Piper and put her in my lap and then, only then, could I put Missy's bowl down. With Piper on my lap, I would literally hand feed Piper her dinner. I know for a fact that Sheila did not hand-feed Piper her meals, because honestly, why should she? Sheila didn't have a "starving" Missy to contend with. But Piper, from the first day I put her on my lap, this little gal acted like she had been hand fed her entire life. Once Piper was done eating, I put the bowl down for Missy to lick clean. That was her reward for letting Piper eat her food in peace. It took a while, but just as with everything else, we figured it out and got into a nice routine and flow.

One of the best things about being pet a owner is that they provide us with so much love and happiness. And it is exactly that reason why the good-byes are always heartbreaking and always seem to come too soon. Sheila, her family and friends, all adored Piper and I know how much she is missed. 

Piper was a very sweet, charming and gentle dog and we loved sharing our home with her. 

Thank you, Sheila, for sharing your Piper with us, we will always have a spot in our heart for your sweet girl. 

* In July I wrote a blog about Missy and Piper and their friendship if you would like to read it: (Missy Makes Me Laugh: Missy and Piper





Wednesday, December 1, 2021

Compassion, Love and Senior Dogs

I was at Inman Animal Hospital yesterday morning with Missy.  As often the case early in the morning, their parking lot was full and they were very busy.  

When I went to check in, there was a young gal at the front entrance with a small dog on a leash. The dog was pacing and sniffing but didn't look threatening so I stopped and asked her if I could pet her dog.  She said 'yes'. I asked what her name was and she said "I don't know. My mom and I found her last night. She's blind". Tears filled my eyes. This poor dog, lost and blind, bless her heart. And God bless this mother and daughter for taking her in.  

As I was checking in Missy, one of the office girls said to the Tech, "We are ready for the Euthanasia now. My heart sank. As I walked out, I saw an older gentleman carrying a hound wrapped in a blanket. The dog was on his back and this big man just cradled him in his arms. I looked at the man's face and he was crying, his face full of sorrow and pain. This was their next patient.  

I got to my car and I cried. I cried deep and I prayed hard. I cried because my heart was just so heavy with what I witnessed. And I prayed because we serve a good Lord and He hears our prayers. I prayed for strength for both of these families, comfort for both of these dogs, and wisdom and guidance for all the workers inside that building. 

I've recently started reading books about the care of Senior Dogs (our Missy turned 10 this year) and started following some groups on Instagram (#seniordogsofinstagram, #seniordogsrule, #seniordogs). I find myself being drawn to the sweet 'frosty faces' and 'grey muzzle' of older dogs and I enjoy seeing their pictures in my feed.  

Unfortunately, along with the pictures sometimes there are some heartbreaking stories as well. After one particularly hard day of sadness, I thought, I cannot do this. I am simply not strong enough to endure this emotional pain and I was going to 'unfollow' these groups. My heart breaks with every story about an abandoned senior pet, or a senior pet that has crossed over the rainbow bridge. So many stories and pictures that are just so incredibly sad and touching, and I think that I just can't bear this much pain. 

And then I read about the people who adopt these senior dogs. I've learned about people and organizations who take in senior dogs and allow them to live their last few years surrounded by love. I read about people who refuse to give up on a dog simply because he is old. And I witness firsthand the family that finds a lost blind dog and take her to the vet to get help. I see a man who provides the final act of love and compassion to his treasured family member. And this is what I choose to focus on. 

I know that I will continue to cry and have my heart broken by stories of suffering and loss. But I will continue to focus on the stories of hope and new starts. I will choose to be uplifted and reassured that there are good and kind people in this world. And I will continue to look for and focus on finding them. 

I truly believe, and I know in my heart, that there are more people who are filled with compassion and love and goodness than there are people who are cruel and unkind.  And goodness and love will always win.  


Monday, November 22, 2021

"Wait for it"


This sweet pup was in a truck as I pulled into the Post Office parking lot. Look at this face! ❤️ 

I am a dog lover and one of my very favorite things to do - in the whole world - is to watch dogs in cars waiting for their owners to return. I love being able to witness that happy moment in their life. To be there and see them when their owner has come into their sight - it is something I will never get tired of seeing. You see it first in their eyes, then the rest of the body gets into the action! To me there are few things sweeter, or so full of pure admiration and goodness, than this.

So, I sat in my car watching the dog and also waiting for his owner to return. Every so often he would move his eyes slightly towards the entrance but he never moved his head. I think it had to do with the perfect sun placement.

And there it was! That look!  I saw it in his eyes - a spark of happiness!  And then I heard his tail thumping on the seat! He didn't move much, but his eyes, and tail, said it all - his owner had returned. He was rewarded and so was I. 

I learned from talking with the owner, Pete, that this sweet boy's name is "Taz" and he is 13 years old. Taz has been taking rides with him his whole life and it is still one of his favorite things to do. He said that it is a bit harder for Taz to get in and out of the truck so now he carries a ramp in the back for him. Pete said that Taz is always ready and eager to go for his ride each morning, so they go for a ride. Bless. 

I stayed and talked with the owner for a bit longer, all the time scratching Taz on his head and ears. This dog was just so gentle and sweet. I left the Post Office that morning so grateful for the opportunity to witness, again, the love between a dog and his owner. The devotion and commitment and dedication of both Taz and his owner to each other, it was pure and it was deep. 

I am once again reminded that there is love and joy everywhere, if you look for it.  Even in the Post Office parking lot on a Tuesday morning. ❤️🙏




Monday, November 8, 2021

Nesting

We turned the clocks back an hour this past Sunday. The gain and loss of the hour means little to me - what I am most excited about is the change in season! 
 I am a cold-weather gal through and through. I love the crisp air and I love being in the house all warm and cozy in my layers with at least 14 candles burning at once1

Turning the clock means that it's going to get dark earlier and I LOVE that too! I have a strong nesting instinct and the colder, darker weather draws me in tight and cozy. I do believe, if it were feasibly possible, I would be content to never leave my house again2.


Just inside my front door I have a wire basket filled with vintage wind-up clocks. I love their simplistic design and function.  Nothing fancy about them, just the basics to do the job. 

In addition to their visual appeal, I am comforted by the memories they provide me.  I am also soothed by the repetitive sound they make. When we were younger, we often slept over at our Vo-Vo and Feety's house3. They had a wind-up clock on the mantel and the sound of a vintage clock always takes me back to that time of being taken care of.

I am out with Missy around 5am every morning. I love that first hit of cold air this time of year. The first thing I do when I step outside, no matter the season, is look up. I look up at all the stars and think about the vastness of the sky. As I look up, I also take in the beauty and the glory of it all. I feel renewed and deeply blessed to be able to be here now as a new day begins. 

I know that they say that you only live once, but my thoughts are that you only die once - you live every day. And I never want to lose the grateful heart for as long as I have a new day. 

1. As opposed to 9 candles burning all the other times
2. At least from November through February
3. It's what we called my mom's parents







Wednesday, October 20, 2021

Gifts of Love: Sally and Molly

This is Sally.  She is a mix of Poodle and Shih-tzu and she is 3 years old. Every single day, sometimes twice a day, I see either Glenn or Rita driving very slow through the neighborhood with Sally in the front seat. I have been admiring this sweet gal for a while and I set out to meet her.     
 
Glenn* told me that the first time he took Sally out for a ride around the neighborhood he was thinking that if she ever got loose, she would know where she was, and perhaps, remember how to get back home. One time was all Sally needed. The next day she was following Glenn around the house wanting to go for another ride.  Now, every day - and sometimes twice a day if she can convince them - they go for a ride! 😊

Sally does not like busy roads or oncoming traffic, so they learned to stay within our neighborhood and go really slow. Most times, Sally sits in the front passenger's seat with her front paws on the middle console and her rear paws on the seat while looking straight ahead through the windshield. Oh, how it just tickles me so to see them pass by my house every day! 

Sally started out the first 8 weeks of her life in a home with 3 children. They adored her and Sally clearly has fond memories of them. To this day, she keeps an eye out for the children in our neighborhood, and when she sees them, she gets really excited and cries.  

Glenn told me that Miss Sally loves to dress up and insists on sleeping each night in her "nightshirt".  And boy is Sally smart!  As Glenn said "Like a parent that thinks their child is the smartest kid in the world. Every dog that's been a part of our family had its own personality and won a special place in our hearts. Sally is the most intelligent dog we've ever had. No one-word dog commands for her; she understands complete sentences. Many times, she has surprised us by reacting to our family conversations."  

It only took one delivery from "Barkbox" for Sally to need to investigate each and every box that comes into their house. She thoroughly sniffs each box and if she smells a treat, she knows that it's for her and she "dances around like a circus dog". But apparently, it's not the treats that she is after, that's just the way she knows that the box is for her. It's the toy that accompanies the treats that she is interested in. When Sally is not riding in the car, she loves to play!  

For a long time, I have watched Sally passing through my neighborhood and each and every time it brings me joy. I love that this simple act, riding in the car, makes her so happy. And, I love that Glenn and Rita want to make Sally happy by taking her for a ride! 

Originally, my blog was going to be all about Sally and what we do out of love for our pets. We have a hundred things we do for Missy, and I know from talking with my pet-owner friends that they do too. But Tuesday I witnessed the ultimate gift of love. 
 

This is Molly. She was 14.5 years old, and like Sally, she was a mix of Shih-tzu and Poodle. 

Tuesday morning I was at the vet's office picking up medicine for Missy. Pat, my neighbor and friend, came in extremely distraught. Molly had been sick and they had a very rough night with her. Through her tears Pat told Megan that she thought that it was time. I asked Pat if she would like me to stay.  She said yes and I stayed. 

Molly came to Pat and Joe when she was 8 weeks old. She lived a good life eating cookies (Milk Bones) watching TV with Joe during the day and watching game shows with Pat in the bedroom at night. Molly laid on the foot of the bed directly in front of the TV, like she was actually watching it, while Pat worked the puzzles. When it was time for bed, Molly joined them. She was a big fan of snuggling and would nuzzle right up to Joe every night. Her snoring never bothered them much, it just meant that she was sleeping well.  

Molly didn't like thunder or lightening but if she did have to go outside in the rain, she would sit down and look directly up with the rain coming down on her face.  She seemed to really like this experience and it made Joe and Pat laugh every time! 

Molly went on every trip with them and had been to Connecticut and Florida many, many times.  Her most recent trip was this past summer when Joe and Pat visited friends in Florida. She liked to ride in the car and Molly's comfort was a big factor in their choice of which vehicle to buy. They repeatedly bought the Honda CRV because the seats didn't slope down. Because the seats went straight across, Molly could lay comfortably for longer periods of time. 

Molly wasn't crazy about getting baths, but she loved Amanda, her groomer.  Another thing she wasn't crazy about were flies. Any time that Molly saw a fly in the house, she could not rest until Joe got out the swatter and took care of it. And just the opposite of Sally, Molly wasn't big on toys, but she loved treats!  She wasn't fed people food except for on Thanksgiving. Molly got turkey on Thanksgiving. What a treat!  

Tuesday afternoon, Pat and I went to the Spartanburg Humane Society to donate Molly's dog food and treats. Pat wanted these dogs to have the things that Molly loved. There are going to be some happy and well-fed pups, I know that for sure. 

Giving 873 belly rubs a day (I'm looking at you Missy) taking them for a ride in the car, buying them the treats and toys they like, these are just some of the ways we show our dogs how much we love them. But these are the easy ones. They are not all easy. 

Having to make that painful decision, knowing that it is time to say goodbye to your dog, this is heartbreaking and never easy. But as I witnessed Tuesday with Pat and Molly, it was a gift, it was a final gift. It was Molly being held and comforted and loved and thanked. This was Pat and Joe's final gift to Molly; being strong enough and loving her enough to know that it was time to say good-bye.  The final gift of love.

Thank you Glenn, Rita, Pat and Joe for letting me share Sally and Molly. 💓


* Please check out Glenn's website and sign up for his newsletter!  He is fabulously  entertaining!  www.glennstrange.com  



Wednesday, October 6, 2021

25 Years with Bill 💗

I married Bill 25 years ago today.  Twenty five years, or 9,129 days, ago on a Sunday1 afternoon in Meriden, CT we said "I do" in front of 75 family members and friends.  The Macarena was #12 on the music charts and Bill Clinton was three years into his first term as President. Lois and Clark also got married on this date, as did Faith Hill and Tim McGraw.  

Twenty-five years ago I was 34 years old and recently purchased my own condominium.  I was a sergeant in the Army National Guard and had already been working and supporting myself for more than 10 years. I had spent a long time relying on myself and I didn't think that it was possible for someone to love me without trying to change me or my life. 

Since that day, 300 months or 219,103 hours ago, Bill has been my solid and safe foundation. Not once have I looked and not found him. He has always been, and always will be, right beside me with his hand on my shoulder.  

Sometimes his touch is gentle and I barely notice it - those are the times when he knows I'm doing just fine. Sometimes the touch is a little firmer, for when I need a bit of guidance.  And sometimes, sometimes the grip is tight as those are the times when he is holding me up. There has never been a time, not once in more than 25 years, when I doubted him or his love for me. I have never not felt his hand on my shoulder.   

I know of no other person who is as consistent or as fair as this man. He never waivers in his loyalty, his wisdom or his love. He loves to listen to Willie Nelson, Kris Kristofferson, Frank Sinatra and Bob Dylan. He researches each and every single purchase before he buys anything. Anything. Frustrating sometimes, but he is seldom disappointed and he seldom makes a mistake by overpaying.  

He loves Seinfeld, Michael Scott, slapstick comedy, British humor, Ron Swanson, people falling down and dogs doing silly things. And fart jokes!  I mean who doesn't love fart jokes, fart noises and simply hearing the word 'fart'?!  It's a trait he shares with Jeffrey and Christine - two of his children.  Oh my, how they will laugh themselves silly talking about farts! 

He is incredibly patient and always fair. He helps me keep the house clean, keeps our cars and garage spotless and has never once told me my studio was a mess or has he made me feel guilty for having the whole room to myself. 

He goes with me to the vet with Missy and buys me blueberries because he knows that I like them when they are especially fat and plump. He takes me to Key West, even though we have literally been there 7 times already. And, while we are in Key West, he doesn't complain when I want to spend a lot of time at The Butterfly Conservatory3

He is an excellent and careful driver and does not speed or drive like a jerk. He whistles like someone who doesn't know he is whistling and he is always looking for ways to make our lives better. He has tremendous patience with people and situations and never makes a promise he can't honor.  And, he is never, ever, ever late for anything. Ever.

He does not complain when I burn candles, no matter how many I burn at once, and he always has my back and gently corrects me when I need it.  He does not spit or swear, he always opens the car door for me and he will wrap the presents because he knows it's not my favorite thing to do. 

He eats a hard boiled egg every day and can drink coffee right up until he goes to bed at night. He likes the hard peppermint candies that restaurants put out and has tremendous willpower when it comes to eating chocolate. A trait I particularly admire.

He never rolls his eyes when I tell the waitress exactly how I want my meal prepared and he holds the hot Baked Ravioli dish so I can spoon it onto my plate. He lets me go in front of him in the salad bar line and doesn't seem to mind when I take the good lettuce. He is extremely gentle with Missy and takes great care when he has to wipe the gunk from her eyes. He has never once told me I can't do something, and he always supports and encourages me in every single thing I do or try. 

No matter what we are doing on Sunday night, he makes sure that I never miss 'The Dog Park' at 7:05 on AFV.  He goes to the library for me and makes sure my tires are properly inflated and never become worn.  He is never mean, and he understands and respects when something is done or said in confidence, and, he is an excellent judge of character - something I seem to have to always learn the hard way. 

He takes great pride in maintaining our yard and he has planted (and sometimes replanted) every single shrub, plant and flower in our yard.  This includes the 48 trees that are in razor-sharp straight rows, and exactly 4 feet apart, that line the inside of fence in our back yard. He shares his pretzels or ice cream with Missy, and he always lets me try whatever it is that he is having. He slept by his mother's bedside when she was dying and he goes with me when I have to get my blood work done.

He always takes good care with how he looks when he leaves the house and he looks great in baseball caps. I know that he has made sacrifices for me but he has never made me feel guilty, not once, about any of them. He has very good manners, is always on my side and can fall asleep, literally, anywhere4

He served our country and will always be a proud and loyal American. He always kisses me hello and goodbye - even when he just goes to the grocery store.  He wakes up happy and always calls me sweetie, even in front of other people. He does not have one single bad habit, never complains and will put away my book and turn off the bedside light when I fall asleep while reading. 

He was with me when we put Ginger down and found us Missy when I couldn't bear the thought of looking at another dog in a shelter.  He does a really bad Elvis impression but a really good Bob from Schitt's Creek5.  He does not lie, does not compromise his integrity and will tell the truth gently if it is not good. 

He has never been lazy, is painstakingly precise in every single thing he does and always works hard without complaining.  He makes my heart smile and feel grateful each and every day of my life. I know what love is because this man has shown me. 

I have been blessed beyond measure by having Bill in my life and I wanted to share just a little bit of what makes him so great. We stopped buying each other birthday and anniversary cards and gifts a long time ago, but I couldn't let this day pass without giving him this special gift.

Sweetie, I love you very much and you are always, always, always at the top of my list of things for which I am grateful for.  I would not be who I am today if I didn't have you in my life.  Happy 25th Anniversary! 


1. Neither Bill or I have any clear recollection of why we got married on a Sunday but it probably had to do with the availability of the venue. 😕 

2. ....and I'm pretty sure we played that at our wedding

3. My very favorite place in the whole world!  Home | thekeywestbutterfly

4. It's true! I have a picture of him in the stands at a NASCAR race....asleep!

5. Bob Jog. All of Bob’s entrances on Schitts Creek. CBC Netflix. - Bing video

Tuesday, September 21, 2021

Honor

In my late 20's I joined the Army National Guard.  I did my basic training and my AIT (Advanced Individual Training) here in South Carolina at Ft. Jackson. Not long after I returned home from my training, I became a full-time member of the Connecticut Army National Guard and was the Unit Clerk of the 238th. My responsibilities were to do all things clerical for the unit. I processed the pay, prepared the paperwork for promotions and reviews and arranged travel for the full time and reserve members of the unit. 

My father was full-time National Guard and he retired a Lieutenant Colonel. I grew up watching him go to work every day in his uniform. I have many memories of him shining his boots at the kitchen table and maintaining his dress greens with great care and pride. I have a lot of pictures of my dad and mom dressed up for the military functions they attended - which were usually mandatory for him.  While I know they both did not particularly enjoy these events, they did them and did them with class. 

I wish I could say that I joined the Guard because of my father, but that would not be entirely true. Looking back, while I was absolutely influenced by him, it was not the main reason for my decision to enlist. I was, and I still am, extremely proud of my father for his dedication and his service, especially in the later years when politics (local and national) made it very difficult for him to do his job.  

In addition to my clerical responsibilities at the 238th, along with four other full-time Guard members I was a part of the Honor Guard. The Honor Guard, by definition, provides the deceased veteran a ceremony of gratitude and a final salute for his commitment of service.  A family can request an Honor Guard be present at the gravesite when the deceased died while on active duty or if they were a veteran who served in an active or reserve status.  

Most of the time, the ceremonies were for elderly military members, and sadly, they were sparsely attended. Whether there were five or fifty people present, the Honor Guard performed the same ceremony; Taps were played*, and the American Flag was removed from the coffin, folded and presented to the veteran's family.  If a family requested it, a rifle volley was performed*. In the two plus years that I was the Unit Clerk, I must have done more than 30 of these ceremonies. After all these years, there is still one ceremony that stays on my mind.  

We were there for a young military man who died and the gravesite was filled with about a hundred family members and friends.  After Taps was played, one young boy ran away from the group crying uncontrollably.  A woman, his mother I assumed, went after him and consoled him. His cries of pain and sorrow were gut wrenching to hear and see. To be so young and to experience such pain is tragic. 

We were in our dress uniforms, representing and honoring the US Army, and it would have been inappropriate to 'break rank' at any time to offer comfort to this boy, his mother or any person there.  To be a witness to such pain, to be there but not there, was extremely hard for me. 

When I look back to that day and my thoughts, I remember that I told myself, and others, that it was too difficult for me to witness such pain and that, if possible, I no longer wanted to do the Honor Guards. Of course I could still be required as needed, but for some reason, they accepted and accommodated my request and used me only when they absolutely needed to. 

Not soon after that young veteran's funeral, I left the full-time position as Unit Clerk but remained a member of the Army National Guard. I stayed in for only nine years total as I discovered that this was not an environment that I liked, nor was it one I felt I could thrive in. 

All these years later and my military service has become such a small chapter of my life. In the years since, I have learned more, and I feel deeper, about American pride and honoring those who served.  I have extreme gratitude for those who sacrificed and did things that were difficult, but necessary. I have also developed a kinder and gentler nurturing heart with much more understanding of myself and others. What I didn't fully understand then, what I know now, is that compassion for suffering is something you feel, something you should feel and not avoid. But you stand up to it and you work through your pain and feelings. It wasn't fair, or right, of me to want to pass off uncomfortable situations to others and I'm not proud that I did. 

I wish that I could go back and re-do that time in my life. I would not shy away or try to avoid the pain of suffering. I would go back and truly "Honor" the deceased and their family with my presence and my gratitude for their commitment and their service.

* Most times we used a recording of Taps. Our bugle player was a reserve member and was not always available. 

* A rifle volley is when three shots are fired in honor of the deceased. Rifle volleys were performed only if the family chooses it. 


Friday, September 10, 2021

Photos: Horses

Within a mile of our house there are three different horse pastures!  I know!  Awesome!  Sometimes I am lucky enough to see them out when I have my camera with me - and I have the time to stop and take pictures.

I am going through all my photos, trying to organize them, and I thought I would share some pictures I've taken over the past five or six years. 

The first five pictures are of horses that my friend Amy Moore (Inglenook Wax Works) owns.  



 

Tuesday, August 31, 2021

Hummingbirds 2021

I started this summer looking forward to taking photos of the hummingbirds as they came to feed at our feeders.  Even though we did not change a thing from the previous years: same number of feeders (3) and same food, for some reason very few hummingbirds came to feed.

I've got my fingers crossed for next year, but in the meantime, thought I would share some of my favorite photos from previous years.