Nesting

We turned the clocks back an hour this past Sunday. The gain and loss of the hour means little to me - what I am most excited about is the change in season!  I am a cold-weather gal through and through. I love the crisp air and I love being in the house all warm and cozy in my layers with at least 14 candles burning at once1. 

Turning the clock means that it's going to get dark earlier and I LOVE that too! I have a strong nesting instinct and the colder, darker weather draws me in tight and cozy. I do believe, if it were feasibly possible, I would be content to never leave my house again2.

Just inside my front door I have a wire basket filled with vintage wind-up clocks. I love their simplistic design and function.  Nothing fancy about them, just the basics to do the job. 

In addition to their visual appeal, I am comforted by the memories they provide me.  I am also soothed by the repetitive sound they make. When we were younger, we often slept over at our Vo-Vo and Feety's house3. They had a wind-up clock on the mantel and the sound of a vintage clock always takes me back to that time of being taken care of.

I am out with Missy around 5am every morning. I love that first hit of cold air this time of year. The first thing I do when I step outside, no matter the season, is look up. I look up at all the stars and think about the vastness of the sky. As I look up, I also take in the beauty and the glory of it all. I feel renewed and deeply blessed to be able to be here now as a new day begins. 

I know that they say that you only live once, but my thoughts are that you only die once - you live every day. And I never want to lose the grateful heart for as long as I have a new day. 

1. As opposed to 9 candles burning all the other times

2. At least from November through February

3. It's what we called my mom's parents

Gifts of Love: Sally and Molly

This is Sally.  She is a mix of Poodle and Shih-tzu and she is 3 years old. Every single day, sometimes twice a day, I see either Glenn or Rita driving very slow through the neighborhood with Sally in the front seat. I have been admiring this sweet gal for a while and I set out to meet her.     

 

Glenn* told me that the first time he took Sally out for a ride around the neighborhood he was thinking that if she ever got loose, she would know where she was, and perhaps, remember how to get back home. One time was all Sally needed. The next day she was following Glenn around the house wanting to go for another ride.  Now, every day - and sometimes twice a day if she can convince them - they go for a ride! 😊

Sally does not like busy roads or oncoming traffic, so they learned to stay within our neighborhood and go really slow. Most times, Sally sits in the front passenger's seat with her front paws on the middle console and her rear paws on the seat while looking straight ahead through the windshield. Oh, how it just tickles me so to see them pass by my house every day! 

Sally started out the first 8 weeks of her life in a home with 3 children. They adored her and Sally clearly has fond memories of them. To this day, she keeps an eye out for the children in our neighborhood, and when she sees them, she gets really excited and cries.  

Glenn told me that Miss Sally loves to dress up and insists on sleeping each night in her "nightshirt".  And boy is Sally smart!  As Glenn said "Like a parent that thinks their child is the smartest kid in the world. Every dog that's been a part of our family had its own personality and won a special place in our hearts. Sally is the most intelligent dog we've ever had. No one-word dog commands for her; she understands complete sentences. Many times, she has surprised us by reacting to our family conversations."  

It only took one delivery from "Barkbox" for Sally to need to investigate each and every box that comes into their house. She thoroughly sniffs each box and if she smells a treat, she knows that it's for her and she "dances around like a circus dog". But apparently, it's not the treats that she is after, that's just the way she knows that the box is for her. It's the toy that accompanies the treats that she is interested in. When Sally is not riding in the car, she loves to play!  

For a long time, I have watched Sally passing through my neighborhood and each and every time it brings me joy. I love that this simple act, riding in the car, makes her so happy. And, I love that Glenn and Rita want to make Sally happy by taking her for a ride! 

Originally, my blog was going to be all about Sally and what we do out of love for our pets. We have a hundred things we do for Missy, and I know from talking with my pet-owner friends that they do too. But Tuesday I witnessed the ultimate gift of love. 

 

This is Molly. She was 14.5 years old, and like Sally, she was a mix of Shih-tzu and Poodle. 

Tuesday morning I was at the vet's office picking up medicine for Missy. Pat, my neighbor and friend, came in extremely distraught. Molly had been sick and they had a very rough night with her. Through her tears Pat told Megan that she thought that it was time. I asked Pat if she would like me to stay.  She said yes and I stayed. 

Molly came to Pat and Joe when she was 8 weeks old. She lived a good life eating cookies (Milk Bones) watching TV with Joe during the day and watching game shows with Pat in the bedroom at night. Molly laid on the foot of the bed directly in front of the TV, like she was actually watching it, while Pat worked the puzzles. When it was time for bed, Molly joined them. She was a big fan of snuggling and would nuzzle right up to Joe every night. Her snoring never bothered them much, it just meant that she was sleeping well.  

Molly didn't like thunder or lightening but if she did have to go outside in the rain, she would sit down and look directly up with the rain coming down on her face.  She seemed to really like this experience and it made Joe and Pat laugh every time! 

Molly went on every trip with them and had been to Connecticut and Florida many, many times.  Her most recent trip was this past summer when Joe and Pat visited friends in Florida. She liked to ride in the car and Molly's comfort was a big factor in their choice of which vehicle to buy. They repeatedly bought the Honda CRV because the seats didn't slope down. Because the seats went straight across, Molly could lay comfortably for longer periods of time. 

Molly wasn't crazy about getting baths, but she loved Amanda, her groomer.  Another thing she wasn't crazy about were flies. Any time that Molly saw a fly in the house, she could not rest until Joe got out the swatter and took care of it. And just the opposite of Sally, Molly wasn't big on toys, but she loved treats!  She wasn't fed people food except for on Thanksgiving. Molly got turkey on Thanksgiving. What a treat!  

Tuesday afternoon, Pat and I went to the Spartanburg Humane Society to donate Molly's dog food and treats. Pat wanted these dogs to have the things that Molly loved. There are going to be some happy and well-fed pups, I know that for sure. 

Giving 873 belly rubs a day (I'm looking at you Missy) taking them for a ride in the car, buying them the treats and toys they like, these are just some of the ways we show our dogs how much we love them. But these are the easy ones. They are not all easy. 

Having to make that painful decision, knowing that it is time to say goodbye to your dog, this is heartbreaking and never easy. But as I witnessed Tuesday with Pat and Molly, it was a gift, it was a final gift. It was Molly being held and comforted and loved and thanked. This was Pat and Joe's final gift to Molly; being strong enough and loving her enough to know that it was time to say good-bye.  The final gift of love.

Thank you Glenn, Rita, Pat and Joe for letting me share Sally and Molly. 💓

* Please check out Glenn's website and sign up for his newsletter!  He is fabulously  entertaining!  www.glennstrange.com  

GlennStrange.com | Keynote Speaker | Entertainer | Magician « GlennStrange.com | Clean Comedy Entertainment

25 Years with Bill 💗

I married Bill 25 years ago today.  Twenty five years, or 9,129 days, ago on a Sunday1 afternoon in Meriden, CT we said "I do" in front of 75 family members and friends.  The Macarena was #12 on the music charts and Bill Clinton was three years into his first term as President. Lois and Clark also got married on this date, as did Faith Hill and Tim McGraw.  

Twenty-five years ago I was 34 years old and recently purchased my own condominium.  I was a sergeant in the Army National Guard and had already been working and supporting myself for more than 10 years. I had spent a long time relying on myself and I didn't think that it was possible for someone to love me without trying to change me or my life. 

Since that day, 300 months or 219,103 hours ago, Bill has been my solid and safe foundation. Not once have I looked and not found him. He has always been, and always will be, right beside me with his hand on my shoulder.  

Sometimes his touch is gentle and I barely notice it - those are the times when he knows I'm doing just fine. Sometimes the touch is a little firmer, for when I need a bit of guidance.  And sometimes, sometimes the grip is tight as those are the times when he is holding me up. There has never been a time, not once in more than 25 years, when I doubted him or his love for me. I have never not felt his hand on my shoulder.   

I know of no other person who is as consistent or as fair as this man. He never waivers in his loyalty, his wisdom or his love. He loves to listen to Willie Nelson, Kris Kristofferson, Frank Sinatra and Bob Dylan. He researches each and every single purchase before he buys anything. Anything. Frustrating sometimes, but he is seldom disappointed and he seldom makes a mistake by overpaying.  

He loves Seinfeld, Michael Scott, slapstick comedy, British humor, Ron Swanson, people falling down and dogs doing silly things. And fart jokes!  I mean who doesn't love fart jokes, fart noises and simply hearing the word 'fart'?!  It's a trait he shares with Jeffrey and Christine - two of his children.  Oh my, how they will laugh themselves silly talking about farts! 

He is incredibly patient and always fair. He helps me keep the house clean, keeps our cars and garage spotless and has never once told me my studio was a mess or has he made me feel guilty for having the whole room to myself. 

He goes with me to the vet with Missy and buys me blueberries because he knows that I like them when they are especially fat and plump. He takes me to Key West, even though we have literally been there 7 times already. And, while we are in Key West, he doesn't complain when I want to spend a lot of time at The Butterfly Conservatory3. 

He is an excellent and careful driver and does not speed or drive like a jerk. He whistles like someone who doesn't know he is whistling and he is always looking for ways to make our lives better. He has tremendous patience with people and situations and never makes a promise he can't honor.  And, he is never, ever, ever late for anything. Ever.

He does not complain when I burn candles, no matter how many I burn at once, and he always has my back and gently corrects me when I need it.  He does not spit or swear, he always opens the car door for me and he will wrap the presents because he knows it's not my favorite thing to do. 

He eats a hard boiled egg every day and can drink coffee right up until he goes to bed at night. He likes the hard peppermint candies that restaurants put out and has tremendous willpower when it comes to eating chocolate. A trait I particularly admire.

He never rolls his eyes when I tell the waitress exactly how I want my meal prepared and he holds the hot Baked Ravioli dish so I can spoon it onto my plate. He lets me go in front of him in the salad bar line and doesn't seem to mind when I take the good lettuce. He is extremely gentle with Missy and takes great care when he has to wipe the gunk from her eyes. He has never once told me I can't do something, and he always supports and encourages me in every single thing I do or try. 

No matter what we are doing on Sunday night, he makes sure that I never miss 'The Dog Park' at 7:05 on AFV.  He goes to the library for me and makes sure my tires are properly inflated and never become worn.  He is never mean, and he understands and respects when something is done or said in confidence, and, he is an excellent judge of character - something I seem to have to always learn the hard way. 

He takes great pride in maintaining our yard and he has planted (and sometimes replanted) every single shrub, plant and flower in our yard.  This includes the 48 trees that are in razor-sharp straight rows, and exactly 4 feet apart, that line the inside of fence in our back yard. He shares his pretzels or ice cream with Missy, and he always lets me try whatever it is that he is having. He slept by his mother's bedside when she was dying and he goes with me when I have to get my blood work done.

He always takes good care with how he looks when he leaves the house and he looks great in baseball caps. I know that he has made sacrifices for me but he has never made me feel guilty, not once, about any of them. He has very good manners, is always on my side and can fall asleep, literally, anywhere4. 

He served our country and will always be a proud and loyal American. He always kisses me hello and goodbye - even when he just goes to the grocery store.  He wakes up happy and always calls me sweetie, even in front of other people. He does not have one single bad habit, never complains and will put away my book and turn off the bedside light when I fall asleep while reading. 

He was with me when we put Ginger down and found us Missy when I couldn't bear the thought of looking at another dog in a shelter.  He does a really bad Elvis impression but a really good Bob from Schitt's Creek5.  He does not lie, does not compromise his integrity and will tell the truth gently if it is not good. 

He has never been lazy, is painstakingly precise in every single thing he does and always works hard without complaining.  He makes my heart smile and feel grateful each and every day of my life. I know what love is because this man has shown me. 

I have been blessed beyond measure by having Bill in my life and I wanted to share just a little bit of what makes him so great. We stopped buying each other birthday and anniversary cards and gifts a long time ago, but I couldn't let this day pass without giving him this special gift.

Sweetie, I love you very much and you are always, always, always at the top of my list of things for which I am grateful for.  I would not be who I am today if I didn't have you in my life.  Happy 25th Anniversary! 

1. Neither Bill or I have any clear recollection of why we got married on a Sunday but it probably had to do with the availability of the venue. 😕 

2. ....and I'm pretty sure we played that at our wedding

3. My very favorite place in the whole world!  Home | thekeywestbutterfly

4. It's true! I have a picture of him in the stands at a NASCAR race....asleep!

5. Bob Jog. All of Bob’s entrances on Schitts Creek. CBC Netflix. - Bing video

Honor

In my late twenties, I joined the Army National Guard and completed both basic training and Advanced Individual Training (AIT) at Ft. Jackson in South Carolina. Shortly after returning home, I became a full-time member of the Connecticut Army National Guard, serving as the Unit Clerk for the 238th. My duties included handling all clerical tasks for the unit, such as processing pay, preparing paperwork for promotions and reviews, and arranging travel for both full-time and reserve members.

My father served full-time in the National Guard and retired as a Lieutenant Colonel. I grew up watching him head off to work each day in uniform. I remember him shining his boots at the kitchen table and carefully maintaining his dress greens with pride. I have many photos of my parents dressed up for the military functions they attended, which were usually required for him. Even though I know they didn’t particularly enjoy those events, they always participated with grace and style.

I’d like to say I joined the Guard because of my father, but that wouldn’t be completely true. Looking back, while he definitely influenced me, it wasn’t the main reason I decided to enlist. I’ve always been, and still am, incredibly proud of him for his dedication and service, especially in those later years when politics—both local and national—made it tough for him to do his job.

Alongside my clerical duties at the 238th, I served with four other full-time Guard members as part of the Honor Guard. The Honor Guard’s role is to honor a deceased veteran with a ceremony of gratitude and a final salute in recognition of their service. Families can request the presence of the Honor Guard at a gravesite if their loved one passed away while on active duty or had served as a veteran in active or reserve status.

Most of the time, the ceremonies were for elderly veterans and, unfortunately, were sparsely attended. Whether there were five or fifty people present, the Honor Guard carried out the same ritual: Taps were played*, and the American flag was taken from the coffin, carefully folded, and presented to the veteran’s family. If requested, a rifle volley would also be performed*. In the two-plus years I served as Unit Clerk, I must have been part of more than 30 of these ceremonies, yet after all these years, one in particular still lingers in my mind.

We attended the funeral of a young military man, with around a hundred family members and friends gathered at the gravesite. After Taps played, a young boy suddenly ran from the crowd, sobbing uncontrollably. A woman, likely his mother, followed to comfort him. His cries of grief and sorrow were heartbreaking to witness. It’s tragic for someone so young to bear such pain.

We were in our dress uniforms, representing and honoring the US Army, and it wouldn't have been appropriate to ‘break rank’ to comfort the boy, his mother, or anyone else there. Being a witness to such pain, present but unable to step in, was incredibly hard for me.

Looking back on that day, I remember telling myself and others that it was too hard for me to witness such pain, and that if possible, I no longer wanted to serve in the Honor Guard. While I could still be called upon if needed, they surprisingly agreed to my request and only assigned me when it was absolutely necessary.

Not long after that young veteran's funeral, I left my full-time position as a Unit Clerk but stayed in the Army National Guard. I ended up serving for only nine years in total, realizing it wasn’t an environment I enjoyed or one where I felt I could truly thrive.

All these years later, my military service feels like just a small chapter of my life. Since then, I’ve grown in my understanding and appreciation of American pride and honoring those who served. I’m deeply grateful to those who sacrificed and faced challenges that were hard but necessary. Over time, I’ve developed a kinder, more nurturing heart, with greater understanding of myself and others. What I didn’t realize back then, but know now, is that compassion for suffering is something to embrace, not avoid. You face it, work through the pain and emotions, and grow from it. It wasn’t fair or right of me to pass off uncomfortable situations to others, and I’m not proud that I did.

I wish I could go back and redo that time in my life. I wouldn’t shy away from or try to avoid the pain of loss. I’d be there to truly honor the deceased and their family with my presence, and to express my gratitude for their commitment and service.

* Most times we used a recording of Taps. Our bugle player was a reserve member and was not always available. 

* A rifle volley is when three shots are fired in honor of the deceased. Rifle volleys were performed only if the family chooses it. 

Photos: Horses

Within a mile of our house there are three different horse pastures!  I know!  Awesome!  Sometimes I am lucky enough to see them out when I have my camera with me - and I have the time to stop and take pictures.

I am going through all my photos, trying to organize them, and I thought I would share some pictures I've taken over the past five or six years. 

The first five pictures are of horses that my friend Amy Moore (Inglenook Wax Works) owns.  

 

Hummingbirds 2021

I started this summer looking forward to taking photos of the hummingbirds as they came to feed at our feeders.  Even though we did not change a thing from the previous years: same number of feeders (3) and same food, for some reason very few hummingbirds came to feed.

I've got my fingers crossed for next year, but in the meantime, thought I would share some of my favorite photos from previous years.