Sweet Dogs I Love III

It's the first day of the month!  The latest in "Sweet Dogs I Love"

Lyla

Jax

Rueben

Misty

Molly

Sherman

Molly

Reagan

Dudley

Angel

Gypsy

Luna

Missy Alden

Bernard J. Pech

My dad's birthday is November 4.  He died on January 8, 1999 during an Angioplasty procedure.  His headstone reads: November 4, 1936 - January 8, 1999.  He died at age 62, much too soon and much too young. 

I've been thinking about that dash.  When you see the headstone, you see the date he was born and the date he died, but you may never know about all the years in between the two. I want to share with you what that dash means to me. 

Bernie Pech was a husband, father, grandfather, son, brother, uncle, cousin, friend, military retiree (Lt Colonel) and a Tai Chi enthusiast.  

He loved eggs and SPAM and that brown bread that comes in a can. He loved popcorn, red pistachio's, Maple Walnut Ice Cream, his mother's peach jam and Ritz crackers with margarine.  He made breakfast for us every Christmas morning and he often took us to his office at the Armory when we were young. 

He loved Rush Limbaugh, Dr. Laura, Louis L'Amour books and Star Trek.  If you asked, he would go into great detail to tell you his thoughts on each of them.  And sometimes, even when you didn't ask him. 

He loved building birdhouses with his first grandson Austin and giving Bumpa beard kisses to his granddaughters Morgan and Kelsey. 

He loved taking cruises and going to balloon festivals.  Every family vacation or trip involved my father and an extremely detailed map.  He was a logistics man and that military training never left him.  

He was the kind of grandfather that wore handmade sweatshirts with his grandchildren's handprints on it. Proudly. And often.  He was the guy at the July 4th picnic with the Flag t-shirt on.  And every Christmas, he wore a Holiday sweatshirt and a Santa hat.  

He wore a "Grumpy" t-shirt.  He was pleased that people thought he was grumpy.  But the truth was that he wasn't grumpy, not really.  And once you got to know him, you understood the joke. 

He created the rough exterior to protect himself.  He craved and sought companionship but you had to get past the grumpy and gruff first.  But once you did, you were rewarded.  My father was extremely loyal to those he cared about and always did and stood for the right thing.  Even when doing so caused him great pain.  

Bernie loved to read.  I mean he LOVED to read.  HE. LOVED. TO. READ. He had a book in every room in the house.  And in his car and at work.  Wherever he was, he just picked up the book and would start reading.  I have a hard time following the plot if the author introduces too many characters at once.  But my father, he could have a book in the living room, den, car, by the bed and at the kitchen table and he could keep all the plots and characters straight.  I'm still in awe!

He loved jigsaw puzzles. He had a table set up in the small TV room and there was always a puzzle on it.  He had a very disciplined and calculated method for putting puzzles together.  He liked to be challenged but he didn't want them to be too hard - he wanted to be able to enjoy it.  I believe he was drawn to the order and sense of accomplishment that puzzles provided him.  And he was good at them.  Like, really good at them. 

He could be very impatient with most people and things, but never with my mom.  Nora is, and was, not one to be rushed.  He always had a paperback in his back pocket and would find somewhere to read while Nora dawdled and shopped.  

He loved my mom fiercely and was extremely protective of her.  When we were kids seeing them hold hands made us throw up, but as an adult, I loved that about them. 

My father died at age 62 and at a time in his life when he had just come to accept what he could change and what he could not.  That realization didn't come easy for him. Under the guidance of a great mentor and friend Dick, he was finally able to let go of his pain and anger and enjoy life. He finally found the peace and contentment that he so craved and deserved. 

I tell this memory of my dad often.  It truly is one of my fondest and dearest memories of my father: 

I believe it was the summer of 1995 and I was in Charlestown, Rhode Island with my Mom and Dad for a few days.  I had gotten up very early and it was still a little dark and cool outside.  

On the way to the bathroom I passed by the window and I saw my Dad outside. I didn't know what he was doing so I stopped to watch.  It took me a few seconds, but I soon realized that he was doing his Tai Chi exercises.  I remember being struck by how serene and fluid his movements were and I stood there watching him until he was done.  

I can still recall his movements and the feeling I had watching him. What stands out most to me is how peaceful and content he was.  That feeling has stayed with me all this time because this was not something that came easy to him and I knew how hard he fought to arrive at this point in his life.  I'm glad that he had peace that morning and for that brief time in his life.  He died much too soon but he died at peace and content. 

There is so much life contained in that dash. 

Must Love Dogs

I LOVE dogs.  Not the "I have 14" kind of love. But the "I will stop and pet every dog I see" and "Ask you about your dog" kind of love.

I used to help out at a dog groomer's here in town.  Every single dog I met touched my heart.  They absolutely have distinct and unique personalities.  Sometimes their personality is evident from the first time you meet them, sometimes you have to be patient and wait for it to reveal itself.  I loved being with the dogs and being able to be both the provider and the recipient of such selfless love. 

This past Friday I found myself in the ER.  I've been dealing with a lung infection and was having a hard time breathing.  I called my doctor who has been working with me since this all started in July.  They directed me to the ER.  I didn't think it was an medical emergency, but off we went to the ER.  

ER's are never good places to find yourself in, and even more so in the COVID atmosphere we are in now.  From the guard at the front entrance to the discharging nurse, and every single person in-between, everyone was extremely patient and kind with me.  I always appreciate kind and understanding people, but more so when they are kind and understanding when they are dealing with people who are not, and there were a few of those in the ER that day. 

After I checked in, I scanned the room to find a seat away from people with the basins in their laps.  Although Bill later told me that those basins were for popcorn and that those people were waiting for someone to come around and fill them.  I didn't know that.  Now I know. 

The nurse that took my vitals and hooked me up to the EKG machine had a dog paw tattoo on her mid forearm.  Because we are in South Carolina, I asked her if she went to Clemson. Renee informed me that she went to school in Pennsylvania where she grew up and that was her dog Sparkman's paw print.   Well, that just got us talking about our dogs.  She showed me pictures of Sparkman on her phone and told me all about the birthday he had last month.  He was 8 and, based on the photos I saw, he really scored with the presents.  I have found that nothing connects people better than asking them about their pets.  

I got admitted to my room.  I got hooked up the the monitors and the x-ray technician came in to get an x-ray of my lungs.  He was very nice, but he was all business.  I didn't get a chance to ask him if he had any pets. 

We were there for about two hours and in came my nurse, Lauren.  Lauren had a very kind face and welcoming smile.  And then, I noticed that she was carrying about 9 empty tubes and three needle packets.  I asked her "Those aren't for me are they?" 1

I immediately told her that I am a hard stick.  I haven't had anything to drink, my veins are not plumbed up, and I haven't had my valium.  Is it possible to do this, say, two weeks from now? 2

With my left hand tightly squeezing Bill's, Lauren set to work finding a vein. But, first I had to advise her of the "rules" regarding this procedure:  1) We can not talk about the veins, 2) I can not see the blood, 3) If I tell her that it hurts and to stop - she better stop, and the most important rule is 4) We have to talk about our dogs. I asked her if she has dogs.  

Halleluiah, Lauren had a dog and two cats 3. I asked her to tell me about her dog.  She told me all about Baxter, her Chocolate Lab.  He is 13 and has diabetes, it's his birthday today and she needs to find a sugar-free cake for his party later.

Lauren was very kind and patient with me as she set to work trying to get blood from my non-plumb veins.  She was having a very hard time and the monitors I was hooked to clearly and accurately reflected this fact.  She got what she could and said that she had to move to my other arm.  Not what I wanted to hear, but she knew the rules and got to work on the left arm.  Meanwhile, I asked questions about Baxter. Soon I found myself falling in love with him too and was angling for an invitation to his birthday party that evening.  

After she got what she needed from me, she sent the tubes off to the lab to get tested and came back with her phone.  She showed us picture after picture of Baxter.  He was a handsome fella and it was very clear that he was much loved and treasured.  

I will always give love to dogs in my neighborhood and I will always ask people about their pets.  There is a special connection that pet owners have.  I appreciate that in good times and I appreciate that in bad times too. 

1 This was of course a silly question.  I was the one in the hospital gown sitting in the hospital bed. 

2 See "Random Thoughts II

3  I like cats, and I'm sure Lauren's cats are very nice, but these are my rules and we talk about dogs. 

Random thoughts II

I'm pretty sure that if I was analyzed in a medical lab, I would be comprised of 97.8% peanut butter.

There is such a thing as eating too many pancakes.

Making hard boiled eggs hours before guests arrive for dinner is never a good idea. 1

I'm almost positive that Johnny Depp has never once looked in the mirror and said "All this...this is just simply too much accessorizing".

I will schedule a dentist appointment for any time, as long as it is more than 2 weeks from now. 

Same goes for blood work.  

Ten times out of ten, Missy will roll over onto her back for a belly rub in less than 4 seconds of seeing someone. 2

A frog in the garage will have me screeching like a 6 year old girl.

There are few greater feelings than discovering that someone has covered you up while you were napping on the couch. 

When someone says "We'll talk about it later", you are probably not going to get the answer you hoped for. 

Why are some candles made with no scent? 3

If I ask Missy to go get me a snack, I will not be getting my snack. 

I've been driving for a long time and I've yet to witness a car pass under a truck. Successfully. 

"Fabulous", "Swell" and "Fantastic" are three words that we should use more often. 4

Finding someone else's shopping list in a cart totally makes my day. 

My cheese omelet needs to be cooked well done.  I don't need to be guessing whether that goo is cheese or egg. 

For all the cardinals I see every day, I have never found a cardinal feather. 

Missy licks her butt, I doubt that she cares if her dog food is "Savory Lamb with fresh young peas and baby carrots".

Bad guys don't always wear black. 

It seems that they name the subdivisions after what they tore down and destroyed; "Shady Pines", "Wildflower Meadow" and "Peach Tree Grove" are perfect examples. 

1. Especially if you aren't even serving hard boiled eggs to your guests. 1a
2.  I've counted

3. Said the girl with 754 candles.  All scented
4.  And "Hooligan" and "Shenanigans" too

1a.  Totally looking at you Mr. Alden

Cards

Imagine going to the mailbox and coming back with a handwritten card in your pile of bills and magazines.  Doesn't that make you smile?  Doesn't that make you step a little lighter?  I know it does for me. 

I love getting cards.  Not only for my birthday, but I love getting cards all the time.  A “Thinking of You” or “Hello” note just makes my little heart feel like it's getting a great big giant hug. 

The only thing I love more than getting cards, is giving cards.  To know that I can make someone else feel good, simply by sending them a card, just means the world to me.  If you are reading this blog, chances are you’ve received a card or two (or a hundred!) from me. 

Knowing that someone may be having a hard or lonely day, and just like that - they can feel loved, isn't that just the best!  And over the past 5 years, this has become my goal and my mission. To be more specific – my mission has become to donate cards. And it all started with a powerful, colorful, expressive and simply fabulous woman named Toni Sanders.

When we first moved to South Carolina, I volunteered at Hospice Compassus and met Toni. When I walked into their office and first met this little (in stature only) gal, I knew, she knew, we were going to be friends.

You could not have a more compassionate, dedicated and likeable person than Toni on your team.  In addition to overseeing the volunteers, Toni also coordinated with the nurses and visited with patients.  One day, I told Toni that I wanted her to be able to give a card to patients when she visited them. That comment led to my suppling Compassus, and their staff, with over 900 cards over the course of a few years. Toni kept the cards in her office, and since everyone loved to stop and see Toni anyway, it made perfect sense that they could get a card as they headed out the door.

Over the past five years I have donated over, and I’m totally guessing here - 10,000 cards.  They have gone to the Alzheimer’s Association, Chosen Children’s Ministry, Shriners Children's Greenville, Spartanburg Regional Hospital, Spartanburg Humane Society, Wren Hospice and The ALS Association North Carolina, raffles, people I know and people I don’t know.  Cards have gone to my neighbors and their church's; Mountain View Baptist and Holly Springs Baptist Church.  They have gone to friends as far away as Texas and as close as next door.  If someone tells me they like my cards, I usually send them a dozen or so of their own to give.

When I am working on cards, the studio looks like a little factory.  All the paper must be cut to size, folded, stamped, colored and put into the envelopes.  Since I usually work on 800+ cards at a time, they are in various stages of progress and take over just about every surface of my studio.  

If I made it sound like work, I apologize because I sincerely love every single part of the process.  I love making the cards and knowing who or what organization they are going to, this is not work.  This is nurturing my heart and in extension, nurturing others. 

Almost every time I give away cards, I usually hear the comment that I should sell them.  And maybe at one time, that would have appealed to me, but it doesn’t anymore.  My passion and my mission is to keep supplying handmade cards to anyone who needs them and to keep spreading the love for as long as I can. 

I read this quote by Erma Bombeck in a book I was reading and I LOVE it. 

“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and I could say “I used everything you gave me”.  

This sounds like a wonderful goal and I'm almost sure that she succeeded this in her life.  I hope Erma doesn't mind, but I have since adapted it as my own goal as well.  And I will strive everyday to accomplish this.